Tennis is supposed to be fun. It’s supposed to be that perfect combination of exercise, competition, and maybe even a little smack talk with your doubles partner. But then… you get stuck with that partner. You know the one—the partner who makes you question your love for the game, your sanity, and occasionally your life choices. Whether you’re at a country club, public park, or rec league, these ten annoying tennis partners pop up everywhere. Here’s how to spot them—and, more importantly, how to survive playing with them.
1. The Ball Hog
This partner thinks every shot is theirs, even the ones on your side of the court. They’ll poach, they’ll chase lobs into the parking lot, and they’ll probably collide with you at least once per match.
How to Deal: Establish boundaries early. Say something like, “Hey, let’s communicate more on who’s taking what shot.” If that doesn’t work, back off and let them run themselves ragged—they’ll tire out eventually.
2. The Chronic Complainer
Nothing is ever their fault. They’ll blame the sun, the wind, their strings, their shoes, and probably your backhand for every missed shot. You’ll hear more whining than a toddler at naptime.
How to Deal: Don’t engage. A simple “Yeah, the conditions are tough” and a quick change of subject can keep the negativity from spiraling.
3. The Coach Wannabe
This is the partner who gives you unsolicited advice after every point. They’ll critique your serve, your footwork, and even your choice of water bottle.
How to Deal: Smile, nod, and ignore them. If they don’t take the hint, gently remind them that you’re here to play, not take a lesson.
4. The Fashionista
They show up dressed like they’re walking the runway at a Lululemon fashion show. Matching visor, designer skirt, pristine shoes—the works. But when it comes to actually playing? Let’s just say their game doesn’t match their outfit.
How to Deal: Compliment their style, then focus on keeping things light and fun. Chances are, they’re more interested in the social side of tennis anyway.
5. The Excuse Factory
Every missed shot comes with an excuse. “The ball was dead.” “The net’s too high.” “I think I pulled a hamstring back in 2003, and it’s acting up again.”
How to Deal: Don’t feed the excuses. Just say something like, “No worries, let’s get the next one,” and keep the focus on the next point.
6. The Ghost
This partner barely moves. They’ll watch balls sail past them, make no effort to cover the net, and generally leave you wondering if you’re playing singles.
How to Deal: Try to get them engaged by calling them into the action. Say things like, “Let’s both move up to the net here,” or “You take the next volley.” If that doesn’t work, well… consider switching partners next time.
7. The Hothead
Every missed shot is a personal affront to this partner’s dignity. They’ll smash their racket, curse under their breath (or loudly), and generally act like they’re auditioning for a John McEnroe biopic.
How to Deal: Stay calm and don’t feed their fire. If they start spiraling, remind them that it’s just a game. If that doesn’t work, give them space to cool off—preferably far away from you.
8. The Overhitter
This partner thinks every ball is an opportunity to hit a winner. They’ll blast forehands into the fence, try to hit 100-mph serves, and generally play like they’re on center court at the US Open.
How to Deal: Encourage them to dial it back. Say something like, “Let’s focus on consistency and keep the ball in play.” If that doesn’t work, duck.
9. The Scorekeeper (Who’s Always Wrong)
This partner insists on keeping score—but somehow, they always manage to get it wrong. You’ll spend half the match arguing about whether it’s 30-15 or deuce.
How to Deal: Politely take over scorekeeping duties. If they resist, suggest a system where you both call out the score after each point.
10. The Social Butterfly
This partner treats tennis as a networking event. They’ll chat between points, during points, and possibly even during your serve. They know everyone at the club and want to introduce you to their friend who’s starting a pickleball league.
How to Deal: Gently steer the conversation back to the match. Say something like, “Let’s catch up after we finish” and keep your focus on the game.
Final Thoughts
Tennis is a game of skill, strategy, and—let’s be honest—patience. You’re not always going to get your dream partner, but with a little humor, a lot of deep breaths, and maybe a stiff drink after the match, you can survive even the most annoying doubles partners. And who knows? You might even learn something along the way—like the importance of picking your partner very carefully next time.
